Posted by
Joseph Lopez on Friday, October 24, 2008 12:58:42 PM
I don't expect morons to be able to multi-task.
I mean, I can barely carry on a blog while listening to music.
But there comes a time when people criss-cross their actions and the ultimate result is...not so good.
Case in point: celebrities, and their aspiriations to be political figures.
Today we'll examine five celebrities, their recent political actions, the hypocrisy of said actions, and lessons you can learn from these experiences.
Celebrities have it rough nowadays - what, with the paparazzi, the gossip, the cocaine sniffles, et al.
So when one of 'em comes out and says something completely, ridiculously stupid about the political campaigns, I almost want to cut them some slack. Almost.
Exhibit A: Chris Rock.
This liberal comedian/actor supported John Kerry in '04 and now sets his sights on the big O.
However, Chris, I'm not so sure you know why you're voting for the messiah Barack Obama.
You told Larry King [09/26/08], "I hope Obama wins just because...the country needs it."
Yes Chris, the country needs a socialist who will take money from the rich (including you, Chris) and the businesses and give it to the poor.
The country needs a man who will overlook the Constitution as a wet napkin on a kitchen table, by taking away your right to bear arms and your right to freedom of speech.
And yes Chris, the country needs a man who doesn't even know when human life begins...because it is above his 'paygrade.'
Oh, but that's not all. Far from it.
You also told the suspender-meister that you won't vote for a man with "12 houses."
Two things though, funny man: one, McCain's family owns eight properties. Many of them not owned by John McCain himself.
Two: I would rather a candidate honestly own eight properties, than a candidate who owns one million-dollar mansion, purchased in aid from a convicted criminal Tony Rezko.
But, damnit Chris! You had to say more! You had to!
This time on the Late Show with David Letterman.
Your one main quote to the disgraceful late night talk host summed it up: "Hillary lost to a black guy nobody's heard of."
Wait! Stop the presses! Chris! You're going to vote for a black guy you've never heard of?
Didn't you just tell Larry "eye-popping" King a month ago that "There's a proud feeling because of the character of the man."
A character you clearly know nothing about, except what the mainstream media feeds you on your 60" HDTV.
Nevertheless, at the end of your interview with another hypocrite himself, you shouted "Obama! Obama!"
Yay! Let's vote for a guy even you know nothing about!
No more Second Amendment! Restrictions on your First Amendment! No more real definition of marriage! To hell with family values! China, here we come! Fairness Doctrine, fire away!
Geez, Chris.
And that's just one candidate.
Exhibit B: Matt Damon.
Matthew darling, how are you? Loved you in Bourne Ultimatum, hated you in your CBS "interview."
Matt Damon recently told CBS News on Vice Presidential candidate Sarah Palin, "I don't know anything about her...I know that she was the mayor of a really, really small town...I just don't understand...it's like a really bad Disney movie...it's totally absurd...it's a really terrifying possibility"
Hey Matt, let me give you a really bad Disney movie:
"A man is born in Hawaii (or Kenya, we don't really know - that's the climax), grows up all across the world, graduates college, starts his career with a terrorist who hates America, raises a family in a multi-million dollar home, while claiming he knows the ghetto Chicago streets, serves as a Senator for several years, never making up his mind, just voting "Present!" like a schoolboy in the first grade, and decides to run for President, pushing his socialist ideals among the youth of America...and wins."
I'm sorry, what do you 'know' about Barry O's? Up until a year ago you knew NOTHING. That, 'I just don't understand.'
Now, coming up in the second part of this blog/article, we'll look into the empty souls of Sean Combs Puff Daddy P. Diddy Diddy, and his suicide-inducing "diddyblogs," Hayden Panettiere and her typical hollywood 'blondestatements," and finally, the recent embarrassing, shocking, and sad statements on the political candidates from Susan Sarandon, and her disgraceful comparisons to figures in the Bible.
To comment on Growing Up Too Fast..., email josephlopez@inbox.com or comment in the respective blog comment section.